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Basic rules of effective communication

Communication has become easier in recent years, thanks to technological advancements that have made it faster and more accessible. Unfortunately, this does not imply that we are proficient communicators.

As we communicate more and more through social media or instant communication apps, face-to-face communication has become almost exotic. With many people, we communicate telegraphically and superficially, but we lack an effective and “core” conversation. According to elpais.com, communication deficits have been linked to a variety of psychological disorders.

What exactly is effective communication?

When certain events in our lives remain in a closed circuit in our minds because we are unable to share them with others through effective communication, emotions are amplified, and facts become distorted.

Avoiding these issues isn’t the only reason we should improve our communication skills. Effective communication is the foundation of quality relationships and has a significant impact on our emotional and, most importantly, physical health. However, this is a two-edged sword: it can be extremely beneficial, but it can also work against us.

Tips for effective communication

  1. You should not expect everyone to agree with you. Even if you’re right, even if you know the other person is wrong, don’t waste your time trying to persuade him because you’ll almost certainly fail.

  2. Don’t interrupt the other person because you’re anticipating what he’ll say or what you think he’ll say. Those who know how to listen are the best communicators.

  3. Don’t appear tired or bored, and don’t get distracted by anything else. Aside from being impolite, it’s akin to saying, “Finish faster” or “I’m not interested.”

  4. Modesty is a necessary ingredient. This is not said even if you have more knowledge or are more cultured, because it is considered self-praise. This has been demonstrated.

  5. Don’t talk about yourself unless you’re specifically asked. Don’t say anything in your life unless you’re asked. Allow others to show genuine interest in you and what is going on with you. Allow others to read your qualities and strengths rather than display them.

  6. Small but effective. A long conversation is not always a good conversation. According to a proverb, what is small and good is twice as good. By focusing on quality rather than quantity, you can avoid boredom and monotony.

  7. Save money on advice. If you are not asked, do not offer advice or suggestions.

  8. Avoid giving too much praise. These raise concerns and skepticism.

  9. Avoid making statements all of the time. True statements are demonstrable and verifiable. However, it has been discovered that the majority of the statements we make conceal our opinions. 

  10. Inquire. It is the most effective way to learn what the other person truly believes and to show interest in him. The questions also indicate that you want to have a conversation, not a speech or monologue.